<> Serendipity - "Fortunate accident"~ Had gone to Movado's last nite with Jerilyn and Kathy. Upon arrival there, I had butterflies in my stomach just getting out of my car. Mainly because I had seen "his" car there. When I walked in with Kathy, I had immediately seen him playing pool, and I nearly tripped over my feet (LoL). I really do believe that "fortunate accidents" do happen. This one? Since last year? What if it as meant to be for me and him? Only God knows! On the second note, we girls had a lot of fun. We watched karakokee, then left around 10:30pm. I just headed home, and so did the rest of the gals. "He" had left immediately after his game was over, I believe that was around 9:15pm. Hum....I guess someone was waiting for him at home. Why the rush? LoL. No, he too tried to get my attention, however, I was doing exactly what he was doing, waiting for him to approach me, while he dropped hints of him wanting me to approach him. To this day, I remain proud of that guy. Achieved his title, being one of the "highest paid" individual within Revenue Canada (government, of course); bought his own house in St. Vital; bought a brand new car. Wow! Completing his degree @ U of M- Faculty of Management. This deserves a second WOW! because he has created a great portfolio for himself. Impressive!!!!! Way to go!!!! Why do I feel strongly about this, everyone asks? It's because of what I had found out from his cousin, who I saw at a wedding social that I have attended 2 weeks ago. His cousin had confided to me that when "he" was told about my marriage, he had taken mine the hardest, and that he had wanted to be the one; his cousin described his facial expression as "disturbed" by the breaking news. To my special person: April 22-25, 1995-When we first had met at a church youth gathering in Portage La Prairie, MB. You were courting me. It all started when they had separated us from our friends, and me and you, by fluke ended up being on the same team. Although, we didn't really pay much attention at the workshops because you kept asking me questions. The second last night they had put on a social for all participants, and you wouldn't stop harrassing me to dance with you. Several times of refusing to dance with you, you just grabbed me anyway to dance. I remember the last day of our retreat, you wouldn't leave me alone until I had given you my home phone number (remember, back in the day, cell phone's weren't as popular), despite me being very paranoid about that, and that you knew of too. You couldn't even stop taking pictures that last day, I believe you had wasted the film of your godbrother's disposal camera. LoL. ....Years then had gone by......5 years later......... July 2000- My cousin had asked if I wanted to be his date for his best-friend's debut, as he was a part of the roses and had no one to go to dinner with. Gracefully asking my cousin as to what her name was. After telling me her name I immediately jumped the gun and asked my cousin, Kevin as to whether or not she has a brother by this name. Kevin then had given me the invitation to see, that day it had been confirmed that she does have a brother by this name, and that I do recall mtg her and her brother at the youth gathering back in '95. I didn't end up going to the dinner, however, I did show up after dinner with my girlfriend at the time and my cousin. We had crossed paths once before and here we were crossing paths again for the second time. I remember you emailing me the very next day asking if I would be interested on going on a date with you. I remember you had left every possible number to reach you at, as if one number wasn't enough. Our first date you had taken me for dinner. I recall wearing bright orange capri pants with my white knickers and a white tank top. You first comment was about the bright orange pants and how you made the theory of how I seemed adventurous and daring, which I was. The first item you had given to me, which I still have? ***Memory Lane*** A bouncy ball from the dollar store and something else, I must of lost it because I can't recall what it was. Or there was the day that we went miniture golfing @ Grand Prix, and you let me win by trading switching our scores around. The day you had given me a picture box with "The book of Love" inside of it; that time we created that scrap book together (which I still have); the "just because" cards that you would always shower me with; There was that time we went to Ruckers and you had won me that cute rut-whiler stuffed animal. Our endless days of eating out every night; playing video games at your house till morning; helping you re-arrange and clean your bedroom; having naps with you while watching greatest movies made, starring Adam Sandler; going to Fun Mountain with all your friends; you joining me and my family at our cottage; remember that walk from you house all the way to the Forks that year? Where it took us over 2 hours just to walk there, just to watch Chantal Kreviazuk perform @ Scotia Bank Stage-that same day on the way back home we had stopped at the train station and had taken more pictures in the booth and promised to one another that one day that we'd be adventurous and take the train all the way to another state, another city; going for dim sum every sunday after mass; the first time we went to the beach and what's her name lost her underwear in the water and you made the comment of "That's not a problem, Wal-mart should still be open!" LoL-in fact it was closed early due to the long weekend; our little pep talks over coffee before you drop me off at home; being my personal trainer in being a pool sharp; our endless pool league nights; pool league party where you were so drunk that you passed out first and we smothered your face with shaving cream and lipstick and that very next morning I was moving over to catch a couple of z's with you, only to find you in between my cousin and what's his name, with your hands on what their ass's. I remember that morning you had gotten horny or something, and you had said that you wanted a baby right then and there, which made no sense at all because it takes a period of 9 months before you can actually produce it, but, no, you wanted one that very morning; the funniest moment of them all, with you being my first (as far as intimacy was concerned), we had done it one day and the very next day I was at home lying on the couch and you had arrived at my house with one of my girlfriends, and I had to go the bathroom. Coming back down from the bathroom, I was walking funny because my legs were so sore from the day before and my girlfriend had made the comment of "What's wrong with you?", as I replied back, "oh, my legs are just sore", she then said aloud (while the rest of my family was there) "What have you guys been doing last night, too much sex for both of you!!!" As I looked at him and we both turned bright red; our endless nights taking a stroll down Osborne and Corydon, sometimes going for a gelati; or that time you had came back to the pavilion after Folklorama to help us move everything back to the philippine centre; me and my friend had decided to throw our stuff in your car, and decided to pull a prank on you, so we moved your car to the back of the pavilion, and I came running back saying that your car had gotten stolen. You were ticked and said "What it got stolen again?" Not knowing that it had already been stolen once; I learned never to pull that prank again; to all those times you had cooked for me; had researched and motivated me to pursue certain jobs; that time you had given me that huge comforter because you felt bad that I was only sleeping with a thin sheet-it's because of you that I love the big comforters now; how we both get cold feet when we both go to sleep; those endless days that we would study together at the library of at the comfort of your own bedroom, cheers to the best tutor. You really taught me my pre-calculus; how we both love to dance and how you were always insistent that you're a better dancer than I am, not; too many more memories to mention. Oh, before I forget, our song that we had both agreed on: "Years from here by 4pm" and "I wanna know by Joe". We broke up in January 2001, not knowing that after your parents had stopped nagging you, you wanted to reconcile in Dec '01. I know that after we had broken up, your parents insisted on continuing to pursue me, and you refused. February 2001-I had a run in with you @ Portage Place, an hour prior to your trip to Montreal PQ March 2001- I had nearly crashed into a car, only to see that it was your car with you in it. This incident happened behind Portage Place. April -June 2001- I would always pick up what's her name at the back of Portage Place and you would always be there awaiting someone one as well. December 2001-you and your family had came to my church, not realizing that I had gone on holiday to Hawaii in December of '01. I had returned after my 3 week holiday, and all I can remember is feeling so jet-lagged that day, and my family couldn't stop talking about you and your family being at the church. A new year began, and it was 2002. January 2002- I would run into you, unexpectedly @ Tijuana's October 2002- Shortly after me and my hubby ate out at Viann's, on the way home we pulled up to a red light, only to have pulled up beside you sitting there at the red light already. December 2002-a few days before x-mas, you had gotten together at your godbrother's house and your cousin was there. Your cousin then had decided to make a note to mention to you that I had gotten married in July of 2002. He confirmed with me in January of 2004 that you had taken my marriage seriously and became disturbed at the fact that I didn't even bother to even think about you for one second prior to my decision of getting married. The truth? I still felt that same way about you, but, in the same breath, I had fallen in-love with my husband at that time. I eventually grew to love him. February 2003- I had gone off to meet my hubby @ Ken's Restaurant and couldn't find parking, only to drive around that part of town till I had found a parking spot, only to nearly crash into your car once again, which was parked by the what use to be known as Mother Tucker's restaurant, now called the Blue Aguave. May 2003- I had came to your parent's home to surprise your mom on her b-day. You were there and I had called it truce. I remember thanking you for your invite with you, your parents and your sister, as you were treating them out for dinner that day. I recall you making a note to mention about your big purchase on your 1st home. 2 weeks later, I was getting away from all my marital issues at that time, and I remember my best-friend, Flo, had dragged me out for a couple of drink on the night of the 23rd of May, 2003. We couldn't find a place on Corydon, so Flo suggested Movado's. Venting out my problems, you walked through the door. I wanted to say hi, but I froze up and couldn't even look you in the eye. As Flo said that you couldn't get your eyes off me. I felt bad after calling it truce with you two-weeks prior to seeing you there (I really felt bad). December 2003- I dropped off x-mas presents for you and your family. Your dad had kept me there at there house for almost 2 hours, as my car ran for that long outside. I can remember how he couldn't stop hugging and praising me for being such a sweet person. To the point where he had made me cry. As if he knew, by this I mean, your dad's exact words "If things don't work out b/w you and your husband....then it was meant for you and my son to be", at this point, I was balling. Thru a mutual patient at the office who happens to work with you dad, Tita Helen, she would call the office and would constantly remind me that "your dad" can't stop talking about you, and at that point Tita Helen knew that he was and still is determined to one day call me as one of his own. I felt touched and in the same breath, blessed. Extremely blessed. January 2004- I have recieved to confirmations from 2 of your cousins that you had really taken the news of me getting married in '02 really hard. I know that still to this day question as to why "you weren't the marrying type"; I know that you had questioned as to why I hadn't chosen you and whether or not there was something the matter with you; I know that you weren't your normal self when you discovered all of this; I know that nothing compares me to any of the other girls that you've dated shortly after me; I know that you had and have certain "insecurities" and that was the reason why you had broken up with me. You were too afraid to fall in love with me because you were afraid of really falling hard for me and then the thought of having to loose me? Your cousin had told me that you were really afraid to loose me to someone else. I now know the reason why you weren't abiding with your mom and dad's advise. It was because you wanted to make the consious decision on your own, with no pressure applied to it at all. February 2004- It was great to see you again last night!!! Now, for those of you who've read this far, if that's not "SERENDIPITY", if that's not a true dose of "serendipity", than what is? <> <!--6:00:00 PM-->
<> Hello, out there!!!! I'm back. Didn't get home till about 3am dismorning b/c the stupid snow plowlers had buried my car under 5 feet of snow. I couldn't even get into the driver's side b/c my driver's side door was completely buried. Ah.....however, despite the cold temperatures of -35*C; I actually enjoyed the outdoors for the first time last night, amazingly. Shortly after arriving at home, Ron arrived at about 3:30am, must have gone out with his friends again last night. Poor guy had fallen asleep in his clothes, which he really hates when that happens. Well, woke up today and was rushed to go to church. I was so tired that my eyes were so sore since dismorning till now. Went to work at noon as they had requested, but got sent home again as the workers are still trying to finish off the new office; which is understandable. Later went to Perkins for lunch, then to St. Vital mall (as usual, my favorite mall); was trying to find some great after x-mas deals. Found a couple of things, but unable to purchase anything until payday. Trying to watch the budget as I am saving for school and a house, in the same breath, have given myself a time limit of 6 months to completely get myself out of debt. I know it sounds like a whole lot on my plate, but like they say you should always have enough on your plate to keep yourself pre-occupied and be able to provide yourself with a safety net just in case all else fails with "action plan #1". Did the silliest thing today, and Ledith agrees with me. I had gotten invited for supper by Oliver's parent's this weekend, so I decided to go today. But, there was one problem, that I was too chicken to go. Why? I don't know why. So, upon arrival in the front of their house, I was too chicken to get outta my car, that I drove around their neighborhood for about 5 minutes, then decided to just leave. Got to Ronnie's house and later chatted with Ledith (Oliver's cousin) on msn and told her what had happened. We then laughed about it really good. Made plans with Ledith for this Saturdday, which will be kinda nice b/c I haven't seen her lately. So, the plans are to a) to introduce Ledith to Ron; b) to go out for dinner; c) to catch a movie, perhaps "The Last Samurai" starring my BF, Tom Cruise....kidding. He's a great actor, but, I am not to shalon over him. Now, just chowing down to some pizza, you gotta love the Caesar's Pizza Hot and Ready to go @ $5/per pizza. Great deals!!!! Now, just blogging as promised for the year. Here lists my new year's resolutions: - To clear all my debts within 6 months - To go to the gym everyday - To blog and read daily - To become a better person-personally, mentally, and spiritually - To go back to school within this year, finish pre-req's and get into hygiene - To pamper myself even more this new year till the end of the year; and to not overload my schedule - To get a smile out of everyone, including my enemies - To be obedient, humble, trusting, loving and respecting These are only to name a few. I really do believe that this year is already going to be a memorable one, and every day I cherish with great value and love to all my friends, family, and the people around me. To be grateful in every way to the highest Lord of all Lords for blessing me another year, another day, another breath in each second he gives to me. I praise you, Lord!!!!! <> <!--9:21:00 PM-->
<> December 26, 2003 Another x-mas has gone by and we have now arrived to Boxing Day; being today!!!! Are special guest this festive season is Rowena. Rowena comes all the way from New Zealand; while touring many parts of the US and Canada; we are extremely blessed to have her come and visit Winnipeg. Its auntie Glor's best-friend's daughter. Rowena is 3/4 Chinese and 1/4 Filipino; she my height; and she's tiny; similar to myself. Oh, and looks good for her age. This year's x-mas was quite fun actually. Christmas Eve, I went to visit Jerilyn and Keo for a bit; had some delicious chicken wings that Michelle had brought home after work; then went to ma's house to meet Rowena for the first time; then went to midnight mass. The church was empty, surprisingly. After mass everyone came over, uncle Joey, auntie Liza and Karl. Me, karl, and Gerry stayed up till 6am playing x-box. I then ended up going home at about 9am; went home to finish wrapping up the gifts; then went back to Mountain; dropped gifts off at my in-laws; and other people's houses; took Rowena out to the Forks to take some video's and pictures; then came back home. Later that night, I tried calling Ron, but, he wouldn't respond to my call; family expecting and insisting that I call him; therefore, I had told Kevin to call him. The first time, he said wrong number; then, he eventually gave in, and said that he was on his way anyway to ma's house; which seems hard to believe. But, shortly after that, Ron and his buddy, Chris had arrived. I was surprised because I really didn't think he would show up, but, I guess, it was because it was "someone else" who had called. He would never accept any of my invites b/c he chooses not too. The new year is fastly approaching and I really do need to make some heavy duty decisions within my life. For instance, my first goal would be to finish university and obtain my degree in hygiene or dentistry. As for my personal life? Humm....that's a funny story because usually I don't agree on discussing with any one at all for that matter, other than to my shrink. I know it sounds really bad, but, hey, you have to leave something to the imagination and cannot tell the entire world what's goin on with your true life, diba? At this point, I do feel wounded. I don't think I will ever have the capacity to love anyone for that matter. Just horrible thought of being hurt again, time and time, over and over again. Now, I truly can understand the true meaning of being wounded and that all wounds take time to heal and sometimes won't heal at all. At this point, I am wounded and I am not sure as to whether or not it will ever be repaired or if I will ever heal from this wound. But, what I do know is that because of this wound, I have become a stronger person, and that I will continue to grow to become an even stronger and wiser person; where I will be able to conquer my loneliness and finally have oneness within my self. Here's to a brand new year full of joy and happiness and to letting go of the one I truly love and if it truly was meant to be, it will eventually come back to me. Although it will cause a whole lot of heartache and saddness in my life; it will be only for a short period of time. lc <> <!--1:24:00 AM-->
<> Hehe....now, time for the real blog. After blog hopping and surfing the net, I have decided to reflect on this past year, since it is almost year-end. Here it goes, and wish me luck! This past year has probably been my most difficult year yet. But, I am extremely grateful for this year, for it has made me do a whole of growing up. Not only maturing in a sense, but, learning how to be independant at the same time. By this, I mean to say that this year had to have been the tragic and most difficult time for me, in this lifetime. Six months ago, I had gone through a very sensitive, yet mature matter. I had ADP, meaning depression syndrome from the first separation that me and my husband Ron had gone through. It was the most stressful time of me life; frustration ate me up inside; which resulted in a mental break down. I had gone off track with myself by not knowing myself; loosing my self-control; hurting the people I truly care about (including my husband); punishing myself by starvation; having a completely different attitude towards my inner circle of friends; losing touch with society and not being aware of what was going on all around me. I had gone through conselling with my girlfriend, who now specializes in physchiatry, Dr. Casiano. She has helped assist me in getting through my problems of mentality and disturbance of my marriage. I am shameful to say this, but, no longer afraid because I have conquered the serious illness of depression and I have won this battle. I have become a stronger person; I have found peace within myself; I have gotten back on the railroad track that I had gotten myself off of in the first place; I have found my happy median; I am proud of the person I turned out to be. Through all this I have learned that the older you get, the less easier life gets, and the more complicated it becomes. I guess life can be quite funny that way. LoL REFLECTION OF LIDIVETTE'S LIFE: - GRADUATED FROM ST. JOHN'S HIGH SCHOOL - JUNE 1998 - GRADUATED FROM HERZING COLLEGE - AUGUST 2000 (MEDICAL/DENTAL OFFICE ASSISTANT PROGRAM - DIPLOMA ACHIEVED) - CURRENTLY ATTENDING THE UNIVERSITY OF WINNIPEG - WORKING TOWARDS DEGREEE IN DENTAL HYGIENE OR DENTISTRY - CURRENTLY EMPLOYED AT GARDEN CITY DENTAL CENTRE AS AN ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT - DECEMBER 2000 - PRESENT - PHILIPPINE MUNTING GANDANG BEAUTY COMPETITION CANDIDATE - JULY 1986 - MEMBER OF THE MAFTI RONDALLA ENSEMBLE - JUNE 1992 TO SEPTEMBER 1996 - MEMBER OF THE KAYUMANGGI PHILIPPINE PERFORMING ARTS OF MANITOBA - MARCH 1994 TO AUGUST 2002. ~2003~ - SENIOR CONSULTANT FOR MARY KAY COSMETICS - JULY 2003- PRESENT - OWNER/DESIGNER HOME BASED BUSINESS (SPECIALIZING IN INVITATIONS, PROGRAMS, THANK YOU SOUVENIRS, BALLOONS, ETC) I'M COMING OUT-DIANA ROSS I AM SHINING AND WILL CONTINUE TO SHINE!!!!!!!!! ~2004~ RESOLUTIONS FOR THE NEW YEAR (YES, i KNOW IT MAY BE TOO EARLY, OH, WELL!!!) - TO FURTHER PURSUE THE GOLDILOCKS BUSINESS AND BE THE ONLY FRANCISE IN WINNIPEG MB CANADA. ALREADY HAVE A KIOSK @ PLANET ICE (OWNER: DR. GARY ZIMAK, D.M.D) - TO BE SELF-EMPLOYED - TO PURCHASE A HOME IN ISLAND LAKES OR PRITCHARD FARMS - TO PAY OFF ALL MY INCURRING DEBTS WITHIN 2004 - TO PAY MY CAR OFF (ASAP) - TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL IN MAY OR SEPTEMBER - TO CALL IT TRUCE WITH ENEMIES - TO PLAN FOR MY WEDDING SCHEDULED FOR SATURDAY, JULY 24TH, 2004 - TO PURSUE PROFESSIONAL DANCE AND PIANO, PERHAPS MAYBE EVEN VOICE <> <!--10:17:00 PM-->
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